What is he doing wrong?
Depending on the woman you’re trying to impress there are several things as to why she’s not falling for you as to let you in her bed or in her life.
Bearing in mind not two women are the same, not even two wild queens, (and the same could be said about men) it’s hard to know at first glance what is not working. However, judging from my experience conversing with men and women alike, as well as to my own experience of what has worked with me or not in the long run….I could say the following criteria seems to apply as to what could grant you success in getting the woman you want.
- You’re not perfectly groomed
Yes.. you can be tall, fit, employed, have your shit together, earn tons of money or read tons of books, but if you’re not perfectly groomed you’re definitely losing a lot of points when it comes to seduce a woman. I don’t know any woman complaining “and he wears manly perfume”. Long hair, piercings, tattoos, whatever… as long as you always come out freshly out of the shower and smelling good you’re like someone she’ll enjoy being around with and seen in the company of. It means you take care of the little details. Especially if it’s something you always do. That’s so simple and yet so powerful. Even I can find myself attracted to guys I wouldn’t normally find attracive because of this habit. A man who takes time to look and smell their best is a clear sign that he’s going to be thoughtful and detailed oriented. Some even do it before leaving the gym, even at home. I always heard women loving this trait. It’s not just me, for the record. I’ve always heard women agreeing on this point. Recently showered, smelling nice…. it’s for us what a pair of boobs or bum cheeks must be for men. Very attractive indeed. Is not going to make a man instantly irresistable, but he will make himself noticed to begin with. And if the man is already physically attractive, it can make him quite irresistible.
- You are failing to meet her potential partner standards
Here is where things get tricky, even just for a one night stand, because, as aforementioned, not two women are the same. She may avoid you or reject you because she knows/suspects/notices by your behaviour you may have a girlfriend, or you might not be 100% interested in her, your political views or moral values are not aligned, etc. But yes, you should be mindful of all these things before she takes you to bed too. I certainly recommend women to have all these basic standards in place before they do take someone to bed they may end up regretting wasting their time with. Even if it’s only just for sex, because who knows what may happen afterwards? that way you can avoid falling in love with the wrong person for you. And I think any woman that is going to be worth your while should have such standards in place.
- You are not acting consistent or coherent
Inconsistent or incoherent behaviour is such a turn off. If you say you’re gonna do something. Just Do it.
Yes, some women may still fall for it, they are somewhat hopeful that one day you may deliver what you once promised. But smart wild ass queens already know better and will avoid entertaining such a man further. Even if she really likes him. She just want men whose intentions are as clear as his actions towards achieving his intentions. Even if the intention is just sex. We women like sex on its own too. But just be clear about it. No need to pretend there is something else when it’s only sex you want. No need to waste her time either. She’ll let you know if she’s up for it or not. ;D
- You are not adding any value to her life
All wild women I know above certain age have their own job, life, means of survival, friends, etc. Meaning… they don’t really need a man in the old fashioned way; to take care of them. They already have their back covered. Before, a man’s value was his income. Now that women are free to earn their own tables have turned way too much for men.
So in this day and age I think there are only three or four ways in which you can prove you’re worth any of her time, attention and company:
Safety: She can do a lot for herself but it’s nice to have someone who offers himself to carry a heavy load for her, wants to pick her up here or there so she doesn’t have to walk alone, someone who is vigilant of potential dangers she might not be aware of whilst walking down the road, or simply someone who may want to lend her his jacket or jumper when she feels cold.
Quality company: If you’re not positive, trusthworthy, interesting, kind and engaging in conversation it’s highly unlikely that she may want to entertain your company or your approaching her at all. And if she’s a wild one or a wild queen… most likely her life is kind of working already without your interruption in it. So what can you add that it’s going to be worth her attention and her getting to know you? If you’re not willing to bring something original, refreshing, outstanding, smart or intelligent, caring or loving, then just let her be and leave her alone. Don’t interrupt her greatness for nothing.
What makes quality time even better is also sharing amazing new activities, trips, experiences and adventures together. So if you just offer the regular original cup of cofeee she’ll be bored and completely uninterested and the wild queens will probably even reject you as soon as they see your basic attempts at entertaining her.
Wildness; Because nevermind how much she may love herself or her body nothing beats mindblowing sex with someone who desires her own body more than she does. Don’t you want to live before you die?? because she does for sure (oh yes, the wild label is not just for decoration, it’s a way of life and a taste in music as well)!! But all that may only happen after you have figured out a way to earn her attention, her time and her trust in you. That’s obviously the difficult part for this guy in the song (and most!). I can teach you how though! ;D
Presence: And if you happen to cross paths with one of these wild women and fail to recognize her potential and failed to ask her out you may miss such a woman for ever. Because she may only like confident and determined men who do act on it. Who live in the present, who want the best right here right now.
And if in any time of that process of having her by your side for a moment you think you can take her for granted or leave your opportunity with her for “later”. She’ll give up on you like on “forever”, making it most likely a “never again”. Good thing for you men is that these women are very focused on self growth, probably have a job or a business, and likes having quality time with her friends, families and goals. So do not suffer for your possible lack of freedom, you’ll have plenty of free time for yourself to do the same. She wouldn’t want it any other way. But when she wants you ohh yes, you have to be present and available. But you’ll arrange those times in advance, so do not panic.
Thoughtful actions/surprises; She can probably buy herself books and holidays but she can’t book herself secret destiny holidays or last minute weekend get-aways, neither can she surprise herself by paying attention to what she once said she wanted months earlier on her facebook profile and get it for herself as if it was a surprise. In other words: It’s your thougthful action and intention what has the power to make her life even more special and more enjoyable than she has it on her own.
Oh and it’s never about the size of your wallet; A surprise homemade dinner cooked by a special someone could be way more special than any fancy restaurant in town and perhaps all the more appreciated by her, because if you earn tons of money paying for a restaurant meal it’s almost nothing when it comes to value the amount of time, effort, dedication and willingness to impress her learning how to cook, cooking for her, painting for her, writing a letter with all she means to you, etc. It’s the time and the thought that counts, not the money you spend on her. JLO made it very clear in this song ages ago.
So never make money an excuse. It’s not the holidays you pay for her, it’s not the destination, it’s not dinners you offer to pay or the gifts you buy her, it’s the intention behind those things what may seduce her or not. Buying expensive presents or dinners you feel like you would want your money back when the relationship is over it’s a clear sign that you are only trying to manipulate her or trying to buy her. And neither of those two are good. And we women will find out the difference, eventually.
Give any woman all those above consistently and I’m sure she’ll be thrilled to spend time with you, take you to bed and what not. Start slacking or be lacking on any of those providing excuses instead of doing all the above and she’ll replace you in the blink of an eye if she wants to.
But she may as well choose to just stay single because she’s perfectly happy on her own. And she may not have time to entertain any kind of relationship because she would rather roam wild and free.
And I think those are the only four things you can provide a woman that may make her want your company or your presence in her life. Even if she would rather stay single.
Are those impossible things to achieve? Who knows.
According to insecure men who don’t want to put any work in they are.
But according to wild kings…. they don’t even feel like it’s work, they just can’t help but wanting to do things for you they’ve never done before for anyone else. They just notice how much they’re doing for you that they’ve never done for anyone else before. But then again… perhaps they hadn’t met a wild queen before.
And those are the qualities that may impress any woman, wild or not wild, queen or regular.
Insecure men and egoistical men are so empty inside that they feel that once they treat women like we actually deserve we’ll go and find someone else better. They fail to see that the only reason why good women fly away is precisely them not treating us as good as we know we deserve.
So treat us wrong, neglect us, ignore us, try to play us, betray us or cheat on us, none of that is an indication of our worth, it’s an indication of yours as a low investment and low quality person. And most of us no longer entertain such.
And yes, I’m a bit of a perfectionist, I’ll admit that. If I’m gonna engage in any kind of relationship it’s got to be the most amazing, passionate, lusty, fun, adventurous, supportive and loving relationship ever or I’d rather have no relationship at all. I soon learnt how not to settle for mediocre.
But back to the first song above…..and based on what I wrote above… what would you say he’s doing wrong??
Perhaps you’re just insecure.
Most of the wild ones I know are wild and free and looking forward to levitate the Dua Lipa. I would say one night for sure. The rest of my life that’s a bit much. But if they can keep the initial spark going for long, then … who knows? but we like to take one night at a time. ;D